I was beaten, defeated by alcoholism and addiction.  For 25 years I was held captive in my own prison.  I felt completely worthless.  I had no reason for living.  I started using drugs and alcohol at the age of 13 and for the following 12 years I gave up everything and everyone who loved me.  I quit school.  I was on probation for 12 years.  I committed many felonies.  I went to prison and went to treatment centers. I had several babies, only to lose them to Children's Services.

I had no job, no license, no transportation, no money, no family (because I used them all up), no home, no friends, no happiness, no joy, no self-worth or self-respect....Crack cocaine had broken me down to nothing.

Thank God!  When you are down to nothing, God is up to something!  I had no room in my life or in my heart for God.  Until He completely emptied me out of everything else.  He stripped me of everthing so that He could rebuild me.  I had been lost but trough the patience, love, kindness and determination of 2 beautiful Christ-like women I have been found.  God used 2 simple, plain ole' women to reach me!  And when I opened the door to my heart, just a tiny bit to see if God even wanted to come in, the gates of Heaven opened and God poured out blessings that I did not have room to receive!

Today I am Happy, Joyous and a FREE Mother and Wife.  I am a college student, dedicated employee, a friend, a sister.  I am a CHILD of GOD......I love who I am today and I am grateful for all that  have been through to get here.   I am trustworthy, dependable, honest, and loveable.  I live a good life toda, it's not always easy, but I welcome the hard times in life as opportunities to grow and learn.  What keeps me going on a daily basis is that I know for sure "Who the Son sets free, is free Indeed".  And today I choose to be FREE......

               Karen

(Karen & Family in picture...She is top right corner)

 

I was living what I thought was a really good life and seemed to have everything I thought I needed in life. In 2000, I lost my mom in March and my grandma in October. I had lost my 2 best friends. I seemed to be able to keep it together for a little while by pretending everything was ok. I couldn't let anyone know that I wasn't perfect and I didn't have my life under control. I soon turned to drugs, alcohol, and men; thinking that every man that paid attention to me cared about me, when in reality they were only using me for what they wanted. My life went down from there. Men, drugs, and alcohol became the priority in my life, not my kids or my family.

In 2003 my trips to Tri-County Jail started. I read the Bible from front to back while I was there. I thought that's what I needed to do. It wasn't until December of 2003 that I decided to go to the church service that they offered there and heard a lady speak about not having a father. That is when I realized that's what I was doing. At that point I asked the Lord to come into my heart, to help me with my struggles. I felt a feeling at that point that I had never felt before, the Lord had touched me.

It wasn't easy after being released from there, I still struggled, still made mistakes. I made a few more trips to jail. Through all my trials I had people who continued believing in me and supporting me. I always knew that God was with me. I just couldn't get things right. Ithought I was a failure. In 2006 I once again made a huge mistake that would send me to ORW. "For I consider that the suffering of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is going to be revealed to us"..Romans 8:18.  That is the verse I repeated to myself on my ride to ORW and continued repeating the 4 months I was there. I used my time there to get closer to the Lord and to touch others lives with what I knew about the Lord and how good He was. I was released from ORW 7 months early only by God's grace was I able to watch my daughter graduate from high school. I was the only woman from Champaign County that had ever been allowed to participate in the boot camp program and be released early. God had revealed His glory at that time. He continues to show me the glory everyday of my life. I have my kids back in my life and my family who had disowned me is now a big part of my life. None of this would have been possible without people who met me in jail. They believed in me and never gave up on me, no matter how many mistakes I made. Everyone deserves the love and support I got. No one deserves to just be thrown away because they have made mistakes.

Michelle